All Things Homo. Well, Many Things…

HARVEY MILK IS DEAD.

Harvey Milk is one of my lifetime heroes, and has taught me more in my 37 years about who to be - how to live - and how to fight than probably any other man on earth. If you read some of the things I write and they resonate with you because I come off as fearless or angry, because I’m unwilling to settle for less than what is acceptable, or because I will not apologize for being who I am, then you owe your respect not to me - but to people like Harvey. I am who I am for the same reasons he was, because it never occurred to me to be anyone but who I am - and there’s nothing wrong with that, and I will never allow anyone to convince me differently.

In December of this year, a film by Gus Van Sant will be released called “Milk” (IMDb listing | trailer), starring Sean Penn in a stunning portrayal as Harvey Milk. This film has the potential to reach a large number of people who never knew there even was such a thing as Harvey Milk, which got me thinking about how many people still don’t - even before this film comes out.

This is unacceptable. People have to know.

I’ve written about him before, so hopefully some of you are already on board. For those of you who are not familiar with him, I urge you to take the time - and I’m going to make that real easy for you. Steven Biko, the slain South African civil rights activist immortalized in Peter Gabriel’s song “Biko” once said “It becomes more necessary to see the truth as it is if you realize that the only vehicle for change are these people who have lost their personality.” He understood the necessity of civil rights for all, not some, and he died for what he believed in and fought for.

Harvey Milk was a gay man living in San Francisco, CA at a time when there were virtually no real civil rights protections for the GLBT community to secure employment, among many other things. Harvey was the owner of a small camera store in the Castro district, which has over the years become sort of a queer mecca. Before Harvey, people only lamented the fact that things were the way they were. No one had considered that this was ever going to change, and no one until this point had stood up and said in a resounding voice that would not stand to be quiet: “NO”. Harvey was that voice, which is extraordinary not only because he had the courage to be that voice, but because he pioneered it. There was no map, there was no manual - Harvey wrote it all and got others on board with this journey to help pick a fight no one had ever picked before on this scale outside of the Stonewall Riots. Not because he wanted notoriety or fame for it, but because it was necessary and right and had to be done. In preparing for this fight, he knew he would be putting his own life at risk for injury or even death, but that was a small sacrifice to make he felt if it meant change - real change would result. He knew that the possibility was high that he may be assassinated, and that it was an invariable part of what he was signing up for - but that was his committment to seeing this change come to fruition. He even says so in an audiotape he recorded that was meant to be played in the event of his death by assassination. You can hear it for yourselves here.

Make no mistake, this is not a gay thing. If you’re a woman and you enjoy the civil rights protections you have, you don’t just owe the suffragettes, you owe Harvey. If you’re an atheist and you appreciate that there are laws protecting you from work discrimination - if you’re a person of color or a person of size - YOU OWE HARVEY MILK. If you’re a person who is frustrated because you see how much farther we have to go, congratulations - you’re just that much more like him. Be proud of that, but don’t stop at pride - don’t even idle there - DO SOMETHING. He kicked in the door you walk through with no notice daily, and you’d never even have that opportunity to a large degree without his efforts and sacrifice. The reason I feel a stronger kinship on a personal level is because Harvey was first and foremost an activist at heart, which played first in everything he set out to accomplish. He meant for the world to see that a gay man was just as capable and just as able as Dr. King and meant to take care of those he felt were his community, his family, his tribe.

Harvey Milk is responsible for many aspects of me, and vicariously many others I hope. I’m very angry with any gay man who describes himself as ’straight acting’. It’s insulting to me and an affront to the core of my principles as a human being, let alone as a gay man. There’s nothing wrong with being gay, there’s nothing wrong with being straight either - but to try and assume characteristics of or model oneself behind those who you’re not and never will be presupposes that you’re not capable of being yourself without restraint and without apology and you know what? FUCK that! Just FUCK THAT NOISE. Have some respect - people died for you to be that self righteous asshole, showing respect is the very least you can do. If you don’t find a flaming queen sexually attractive, understand that he’s not out trying to impress you - that’s him being him. It doesn’t mean you don’t deserve being called out for treating him like he’s somehow less than you are or that you’re better than he is simply becuase you have different mannerisms and gestures. If you don’t have the character or fortitude to be who you are regardless of circumstance then you should know who Harvey was simply because he was that person in the face of those who hated him for it and you can’t even be that for yourself. To quote Steven Biko one more time, “The most potent weapon in the hands of the oppressor is the mind of the oppressed.” If you’re going to be a willing victim, be one on your own terms and not someone else’s.

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“No one is born gay, you choose to be gay.” 

I used to get this one all of the time.  It never really bothered me until it came wrapped in a bible and was used as a club to beat me with.  That’s when I started looking into  far more substantial and valid texts where one might find logic, reason, truth, and my favorite - FACTS!  If a fight breaks out, I want to know I can defend myself.  Knowledge and backbone are the best weapons you can have in an argument next to the one thing that will ensure you’ll win, which is a cool head and nerves of steel.

I believe in science and what can be proved, not in jumping on a bandwagon of opinions or beliefs that cannot be backed up with substance and rely on superstition.  That sort of thing is not good enough and cannot pass muster.  It is the same reason why I’m an atheist, quite frankly.  When believers ask me to prove that god does not exist, I explain that it isn’t my place to disprove anything - the burden of proof lies with the believer, and until or unless there is evidential support that is fact based and capable of withstanding scrutiny, I’ll remain unconvinced.

Neuroscientist Simon LeVay, author of The Biology Of Sexual Orientation noted key differences in the brain structure of heterosexual men versus homosexual men; most notably in the areas of the brain that control out attraction to others.  Canadian scientists have further evidence to support this claim.  More recently a team of Swedish researchers have concluded essentially the same findings as LeVey, but for lesbians.  There is much more to be found, including linkage between DNA markers on the X chromosome and male sexual orientation.  Part of this study centered around an interesting finding that asserts homophobia may have a genetic basis also.

The thing about having this argument with intolerant people of any religious stripe is that you’re never going to trump their bible with any argument, however well reasoned or presented.  Sometimes they even make it easy for you and say some of the most horrible, nasty things you could imagine when you get too close to exposing their proclamations as weak subtext for their agenda - especially when they use bullshit phrases like ‘homosexual agenda’ or ‘culture war’.  The point at which someone loses their argument the fastest is when they let their emotions get the better of them and they start throwing out bombs.  They cannot win on merit, so they default to trying to bark louder.  In that second, claim your victory.

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They say if you are not outraged, then you are not paying attention. I for one am outraged, and if you have a single nerve capable of firing off any common sense whatsoever, you should be as well. At the end of this post you’ll find code that you can use to link back. If you come across any links or organizations that should be included, reply with them. Thank you in advance for reading.

We are living in a time of extremist war against us all. What you think could never happen in this country IS happening, while the majority of us live our lives as if we are not affected and nothing will break our safe, comfortable little bubbles. We like to live as though nothing will ever be bad enough to really come in and destroy us, which is such an American trait, and take no notice of those who try relentlessly to do just that. To quote former U.S. Senator Barry Goldwater: “A government that is big enough to give you all you want is big enough to take it all away.” Our government and the current administration throws out catchphrases like “freedom” and “democracy”, “right to live” and “judicial tyranny”, and gems like “defending our homes and families from fanatical, fundamentalist terrorism” almost on a daily basis - and has the nerve to ignore the fact that it has been the victim of the same kind of malevolent hypocrisy. We are living under the reign of Fundamentalist Christian terrorism, and we do nothing to stop it - least of all change the way we think about ourselves and use our voices in dissension. Use your minds and your voices and be the change you wish to see in the world.

Propaganda is and has always been a dangerous tool, especially when it is being used in the name of God. When God and the Bible (and the Quran, and the Book of Mormon) are being used as a club to beat people with, justice is raped and fairness ceases to exist. No one has the right to decide anything for you unless you make that choice for yourself to allow such a thing. I am never going to stand for anyone dictating what is or is not appropriate for me, least of all someone who appoints themselves as a spokesperson for an imaginary sky fairy I don’t even believe exists.

So to all of you, like minded people and not - gay, straight, faithful, faithless, questioning, whatever - understand something. I am an American, goddamnit. A big gay one. I need no one’s approval or permission to be who I am, and that includes loving intensely, fucking passionately, or saying whatever the bloody fuck I feel like saying. If you don’t like it, seek therapy. I support your right to say whatever misguided, rhetorical bullshit you want to say, but do not think for a single second that any of it is taken seriously. And I encourage anyone that listens to you to do the same, because the truth is you speak for no one but yourselves and if there really were any such thing as God then you are all completely fucked.

What you think could never happen IS happening. The same type of speech that Hitler used against the Jews is and always has been used against GLBT people by The Religious Reich. From the fringe to the mainstream, we’re going to cover all of these wingnuts and I’m going to get your brain integrated with them all personally before they take over and we are all forced to live in a Margaret Atwood novel.

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